Blog Post 4 As each year passes by, I can’t help but feel like time slips by way too quickly. This class is almost at its end, my time at UCSD is finishing up, and I’m scrambling to finish up all of my finals for this quarter. I never found aging to be scary, but I always felt like aging meant slipping into a bad state of mind where you’re frantically just trying to play catch up all the time rather than enjoying the current moment. This course has helped me realize that aging doesn’t need to be scary and that acceptance of aging helps you appreciate all that’s around you, even if it may be for a brief moment. I initially decided to take this class after reading Tuesdays with Morrie, which is a must-read for students, especially those in their twenties who feel lost and terrified of “adulting.” That book, along with all of the readings throughout this course, especially Leland’s book, showed me that we will one day be in their shoes, and that we can help determine what our senior lives will look like depending on our own actions. I’m constantly in awe with the wisdom that the elders have to bestow upon us and I hope that we as a generation acknowledge, respect, and absorb the wisdom. I loved the memoir assignment especially because now we have the tools and skills to memorialize the wisdom and stories of those who lived through it all. This past week, we were able to visit the Casa de Manana in La Jolla and honestly, I hope I can end up in a place like that. The place is filled with so many accomplished elders who fought through obstacles like misogyny, financial crisis, and more who are continuously looking to grow their minds and challenge themselves. Being able to talk to some of them helped me realize that career success is tied to having an abundant mindset and being open to new experiences. As we were talking, I could tell that they loved being around the youth and they definitely made me feel inspired to make an impact in the world that they entrusted us with. Tackling ageism is definitely still a major issue but I hope that through what I learned in this course, I can be more compassionate towards elders, be vocal in accessibility issues more, and to be a life-long scholar who strives to make the world a comfortable place for the elders.
Blog Post 3: I think that one of the best things to do to destress is to walk around aimlessly in old and new parts of town, just letting the music blast through my headphones, and enter random stores depending on the mood to window shop. Whether it was in my hometown, San Francisco, or New York, I loved how much there was to see in cities or small downtowns and soak in the hubbub of people going about their daily lives. In college, I made it a point to absorb San Diego in all of its glory, whether it was taking a bus randomly and ending up at Old Town, finding new study spots in downtown La Jolla, and admiring the city lights in Downtown San Diego. Despite my love for adventuring and taking walks, the class trip to Barrio Logan made me realize how little I was actually observing the areas I walked and how much I took things for granted. When walking around Barrio Logan with Professor Lewis along with my classmates, my eyes were drawn to issues that I never noticed. The number of benches, the cracks on the sidewalk, the limited availability of sitting areas like benches, nature components, the number of trash cans, and more. How could I have missed this when I was on my walks? It never occurred to me that people with less mobility, whether they were pushing a baby cart, an elderly person prone to falling, or those with injuries, would have to figure out how to get around town in the safest way possible. I also tended to zone out white noise so I had difficulty recognizing that the highway sounds and the airplane sounds were loud, maybe even annoying to live around. It felt eerie, how the town was very empty with little to few people walking around in the middle of the day. At first, I couldn’t quite imagine the town with a lively community, despite seeing the small hubbub gathered around a quaint Mexican food place right along the church. However, I quickly dismissed the thought as soon as we stumbled into Chicano Park. I had never seen pictures of Chicano Park, I assumed it was similar to Balboa Park, so I was in absolute awe with the powerful art pieces that radiated the community’s power. All of the murals and art pieces sprinkled throughout the neighborhood seemed like a sneak peek of Chicano Park and I loved being able to see the local talent being spotlighted. Despite the grandeur of Chicano Park, I know that I can’t overlook the issues of accessibility and community engagement especially in Barrio Logan. This class trip made me aware of how much I could assess a neighborhood, simply by observing certain components, and it’s made my walking adventures even more stimulating. Overall, this trip made me even more grateful to be able to experience the town simply as it is and I hope that as I grow older, accessibility and walkability is addressed in more neighborhoods so I can continue to explore new places.
When I was younger, I was convinced my parents were secretly superheroes who knew everything. If I had a bad day and needed someone, my parents were there to listen to me. If I had a fever, my parents made sure I took medicine and slept well. I remember when I first heard my parents cry. I didn’t know about the recession, I knew that something bad had happened and that my parents weren’t powerful enough to stop it. I remember seeing my parents for the first time for who they were, just two young adults trying to figure out adulthood in a foreign land while taking care of children. This sudden recognition changed the way I interacted with my parents, and I knew that even though I still depended on them, it wasn’t to the extent where I put them on a pedestal as my younger self did. It made me wonder what my family dynamic would look like when my parents would start to depend on me more than I depend on them. In Leland’s readings, the sudden reversal of dependency is frequently mentioned, whether through anecdotes about his mother or interview subjects. These anecdotes often painted a painful picture of changing family dynamics. It made me wonder how I can address this reversal of dependency to my own family, or if I should even address it at all. With factors like pride, confusion, and financial circumstances, Leland’s interviews made it seem like it was difficult to even address this new dynamic between parent and child, and even more difficult especially when you don’t see your own parents’ relationship with their parents. In one of the class discussions I had with my classmates, I remember discussing the question, “In your own family, have you observed your parents taking care of their parents or any elderly family member? If so, what is the family dynamic like? Is there any tension or was it a smooth transition for this reversal of dependency?” This led to a conversation about multigenerational families living under the same roof, which was a new concept for me considering how my grandparents live on the other side of the world. I learned that the pandemic definitely caused more tension within multigenerational families, especially because of the parent-child clashing. Why do we find parents so irritating sometimes? Their chiding goes in one ear and out the other, even when we know that they’re just looking out for us. Is this what our parents will feel like when we’re the ones chiding them to take their medicines, to go exercise, and whatnot? Again, still something I don’t know how best to tackle but hopefully, with more intergenerational programs, there will be more context as to how we, as the children, can address the reversal of dependency with our beloved family, without causing too much tension.
My vintage dress collection is still very small, but I’m proud of it nonetheless. I still remember twirling around way too many times in a 1950s Candi Jones pink floral dress after finding it at the thrift shop, absolutely filled with glee (shown in picture). I also know now that I absolutely cannot let go of my 1970s prairie denim skirt, which goes well with pretty much everything from a casual UCSD hoodie, a Forever 21 crop top, or even a nice knit cardigan. I just love how these dresses are meant for dancing, to make you sway side by side, just so you can feel the fabric swish past. And I know that the previous owners of these pieces must’ve felt the same way. I love knowing that. I love knowing that somewhere, in somebody else’s timeline, they too, also felt dolled up in these dresses. It’s a shared experience. That’s why I love listening to old people talk about their past, nodding along as they describe their first heartbreak, their first time holding a baby, their wedding, and more. I know that I’ll get to that chapter of life one day and experience those same feelings, but for now, I get to just listen and in a way, time travel. In this class, I get to talk with others who understand the importance of this shared experience. The book we talk about together encourages those who read it to pursue this intergenerational connection. Leland’s book focuses on the elderly, which in turn helps us focus on our own core values and think about what we want to prioritize in life as the seasons change. Some of my favorite discussion questions created by my peers have become questions I ask myself constantly now, whether it’s questioning what I think MY definition of successful aging will look like, or if the gero-punk mentality is right for me. Some questions have led me to answers that demanded immediate action such as developing healthy relationships with others, both platonic and romantic, because of the studies that showed the importance of relationships in aging. I’m not sure if others feel the same way I do about the shared experience, but I do look forward to hearing from my peers about what they learned from their EP interviews and I’m excited to discuss more about Leland’s book with my classmates! Maybe somebody out there might also like vintage dresses too, who knows?
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Miyu NakajimaMiyu Nakajima is a International Business major with a minor in Supply Chain. She is from San Jose, CA Archives
March 2022
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